Genesis 34:8-10

‘And Hamor entered into discussion with them, saying, “The soul of my son Shechem longs after your daughter. I beg you, give her to him to wife. And you make marriages with us. Give your daughters to us, and take our daughters to yourselves. And you will dwell with us, and the land will be before you. Dwell and trade in it, and obtain your possessions in it.” '

Hamor's words are addressed directly to Jacob (‘your daughter' - although ‘your daughter' might mean a daughter of the tribe as with ‘your daughters' and ‘our daughters', compare the brothers' use in verse 17) but intended to include all the brothers (them). He recognises that great offence has been caused and seeks to defuse the situation by offering very favourable terms. The invitation to become full members of the community might have been welcomed by many semi-nomadic tribes. It would no doubt include having land of their own and a settled future, being absorbed, like Lot was, into the community, although not all semi-nomads would be pleased so to lose their independence.

But from the religious point of view it would have been the end of the covenant and the destruction of what they stood for. Inter-marriage would have introduced the tribe practically to Canaanite religion of the most debased kind, and settling down and being absorbed would have cancelled the covenant.

There are interesting contrasts in the story that unfolds that are psychologically accurate. Hamor and Jacob, the wise patriarchs, concerned to put the matter right as far as possible and reduce the tension, ready to compromise and wishing to settle the matter peaceably. Shechem, still not fully aware of how deeply he has offended. After all it was only a tribal woman and he was offering her a great privilege, and so he was thinking that all could be settled by marriage and a sufficient payment. The brothers, totally unwilling to compromise, believing that a dreadful sacrilege has been committed and determined that at any cost they will have vengeance. These were the constituent members of that meeting. And it was the brothers who took over. Jacob finds himself thrust to one side, but is willing to go along with his sons, not realising their full intentions, and only too relieved that a possible solution can be found.

Meanwhile Dinah is being held in the king's house (Genesis 34:26). This may have been for protection, or because of her distressed state, or possibly to ensure that the marriage went forward. Either way it is clear that hidden pressures are being put on Jacob.