Matthew 19:11

‘But he said to them, “Not all men can receive this saying, but they to whom it is given.” '

Jesus replied, “Not all men can receive this saying, but they to whom it is given.” There has been much dispute as to whether ‘this saying' refers to the disciples' saying in Matthew 19:10, “if the case of the man is so with his wife, it is not expedient to marry,” or whether it refers to Jesus' earlier sayings about the permanence of marriage on the basis of the creation ordinance.

It would not, however be in accordance with Jesus normal method to compromise on straight teaching and He never elsewhere suggests that the clear teaching of Scripture need not be followed. Indeed He stresses that it must be followed, and in Matthew 5:18 He speaks with disapproval of those who compromise on the teaching of the Law. Had He said not all ‘will receive it' that might have been possible in line with Matthew 5:18. But He would not have agreed that they were ‘unable to receive it'. So there can really be no doubt that He would have seen all who heard Him as able to receive His teaching, especially as it was taken directly from Scripture. Furthermore on the basis of His reason for teaching in parables He would not have taught it openly if He had thought that they were unable to receive it.

On the other hand, as Matthew's intention in citing these words is in order to lead in to what follows that would seem to solve the problem, for the application of these words must surely be determined on the basis of the ensuing argument, simply because it was these words that led into that argument. Thus on that basis ‘this saying' must be referring to the expediency or otherwise of not marrying. The idea is that Jesus will now point out that rather than what the disciples have said being a clinching argument against what He has stated, (His silence as to the matter indicating that it was nothing of the kind as subsequent generations of disciples would demonstrate), it does rather certainly hold within it a certain degree of truth, and that is that marriage is not always expedient, and that it is no longer to be seen as the be all and end all of life (indeed one day it will disappear - Matthew 22:30). This is the new truth that has been ‘given to them' (compare Matthew 13:11), as demonstrated by what they have said. For the idea that a man did not need to marry, and that not doing so might be expedient for him, was almost as revolutionary an idea as the previous one.

For to most Jews marriage was seen as a God-given duty as well as a privilege. Thus Jesus was taking the one case introduced by the Pharisees, the permanence or otherwise of marriage, and possibly their argument against it, which they considered clinching because marriage was the duty of all men, and demonstrating that it did indeed justify some men in not marrying, and that the disciples had therefore rightly gathered from it a truth given to them by God. He is saying that they are right in suggesting that sometimes, contrary to popular thought, it is not expedient to marry, and that that is therefore a truth that has been ‘given' to them (it is as important as that!). And He then give three examples where it would not be expedient, one brought about by nature (or by ‘Heaven'), one brought about by men, and one brought about by the requirements of the Kingly Rule of Heaven.

Note Jesus' stress on the fact that all men cannot receive this saying, but only those to whom it is ‘given', that is, those under the Kingly Rule of Heaven. The Pharisees and the Jews in general thought that such a statement was self-evidently wrong. Thus the fact that His disciples now see it as a possibility indicates that God has ‘given' them understanding as to its truth. He is pointing out to His disciples that while for many celibacy is not an option (Paul put it this way, ‘it is better to marry than to burn with unrelieved desires' - 1 Corinthians 7:9), for others it is actually a requirement for the sake of the Kingly Rule of Heaven. It had been true for John the Baptist. It was true for Him. In the future it would be true for many. A man who marries does not fall short of the glory of God (1 Corinthians 7:28; 1 Corinthians 7:36 with Romans 3:23), but neither does a man who does not marry (this was the new idea). It is simply that the former will have extra cares loaded on him which may hinder his service for God. On the other hand men must remember that not to marry might result in thoughts and behaviour that rendered their service to God void. Many who have embraced celibacy have sinned grievously against God and men, and have brought disgrace on the name of Christ. And even worse sometimes there are those who cover up their sins and allow them to continue for the sake of appearances, which makes them guilty of all their sins and more. Thus while each must choose to marry or not to marry according to what God reveals to him as his duty, and either is an open option, everything needs to be taken into consideration. Better the ‘burdens' brought about through marriage, than sinful failure caused by not being married. Each must therefore decide before God what he can cope with.