Ephesians 5:25

“Husbands, love your wives, even as Christ also loved the church, and gave Himself up for it”

“Love”: The love demanded of the husband by God is the highest form of love ever known to man (1 Corinthians 13:4). “Even as”: “Self-surrender so complete that it can be compared with the redeeming grace of Christ” (Erdman p. 121). “And gave Himself up for it”: Stott says, “Does the requirement of submission sound hard to. wife?. think what is required of her husband is harder. This is not that he love her with the romantic, sentimental and even aggressive passion which frequently passes for genuine love today; instead, he is to love her with the love of Christ” (p. 234).

This is not. love based on self-interest because that type of love will always fail. This is the love that can love the hard to love or the unlovable (Romans 5:6). “This divine kind of love is not motivated by self-interest or the attractiveness of the one loved, but by. sincere interest in that person's well being” (Boles p. 314). This love is intelligent, purposeful, self-sacrificing, loyal and noble. “Someone then asks, ‘Why doesn't Paul say that wives should love their husbands like that?' Paul did say that. He said it when he instructed them to be in subjection to their husbands. Her obedience, freely and willingly given, is the greatest evidence of her love for him. The woman who will not submit to her husband loves neither him nor the Lord” (Caldwell p. 271). Stott points out that "submission" and "love" are two aspects of the very same thing, namely that selfless self-giving which is the foundation of an enduring and growing marriage (p. 235). Headship is only for the mature. Being the "head" means placing the welfare and interests of one's wife ahead of your own. "Headship" involves being unselfish. Alford reminded husbands, “Do you wish your wife to obey you, as the church obeys Christ? Then take care for her, as Christ did for the church” (p. 1243).

The purifying love